time to clear the head…
today was a day to run easy, really easy, and let my mind wander and wonder. so, after another trying day at work, I hit the trails at the Scott Arbs at Swarthmore College. it is one of my old regular running spots. in fact, when I coached at the school district where I teach and when I was married and living in that same district, I would run there two or three times a week. I have since moved on to other favorite running spots, but the arbs will always hold some great memories. today I meandered through the trails at an easy pace, stopped to meet a bull mastif puppy and thought about nearly everything there is to think about on a run. it was a great afternoon. the sun is setting earlier and earlier as the days get shorter and winter looms in the near future. the temp was warm for most of the day today, but the chill was evident as the sun descended behind the hills and buildings of the College. my legs were a little tired today after back to hourish runs over the weekend and the 7xhill workout yesterday on the Rocky Run trails before my strength training. hills are so much fun to do. I can’t imagine not running hill workouts. when they cease to be fun, I may cease to run…
tomorrow, I meet with the athletic director at Springfield to discuss my resignation, review the season, my tenure, and the future of the XC program. I appreciate the fact that Glenn wants my input on the direction the program needs to go. but, I’m not sure I have any answers for him. if I had a clear picture of the future of the program I might not be resigning. in fact, today was the first day I actually thought about withdrawaling my resignation and heading back for another year. I love coaching cross country and would like to continue to do so. I do not really want to be a principal, that urge has faded again. however, I do not want to, nor can I see myself teaching elementary art in two-three-or five years. that is the dilema I face. most of my colleagues and friends try to convince me that a Master’s Degree for the increase in pay would make it easier for me to hang on doing what I am currently doing. but, it has never been and will never be about the money for me. if it was about money, I would have majored in business or stayed in retail moved into management and then upper management etc. or, I would have put more energy into real estate as a career or second career. but, the $ is not the over-riding issue for me. the issue for me is the challenge, the intellectual exercise, the comfort in knowing I like what I do. as an art teacher, that has come to me on those rare occassions that I have had students with talent and intellectual curiosity. force-feeding crap lessons to less-talented students does not interest me. I know that teachers are supposed to be interested in helping everyone in the class and be satisfied with students who are “doing they’re best“…but, I would rather have talented kids at the upper levels of the subject area who can draw and paint, but need guidance in the finer points of the process. that is not happening in my current job any time soon. a career shift is in-order, I am just figuring out which way to pivot.
possibly a rest day tomorrow- more time to think about what is next…
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